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bitchie

Bitchie's Books

Avid reader, part time gamer. I read and review books for other readers, not for authors. I review mostly M/M books, so if that doesn't float your boat, well, there are other boats in the sea, other reviewers in this great blogosphere!

Currently reading

In The Absence of Light
Adrienne Wilder
My Brother's Lover
Lynn Kelling

I'll Protect You, I Promise

I'll Protect You, I Promise - Lauren Thomson I put this on my DNF shelf, but it was short, so I went ahead and finished it. This review is spoiler city, so if you think you might read this book, rethink it, fast! Read this review!

I think this book must have been written by a teen, because it was just AWFUL. Mixed up names, missing word, capitalizations where none were needed, no caps at the beginning of some sentences.

But what really makes me think it was written by a kid, and not a poorly educated adult, was the plot. It was just so utterly ridiculous. James' parent are horrible. They are part of a gang, but not a regular street gang. So what, mafia? I'm not sure, because that's all that was said- they are part of a gang, they kill people, torture them, rape and kidnap, have slaves, sell people. So when James' mom has a baby, James knows he can't let them ruin her life like they did his, so he takes her and runs. Big manhunt, he's on the news, and he goes just a few towns over? He didn't even leave the state? Manages to sneak back into his house to get baby things? Sleeps in an alley with a newborn, then applies for a job at Starbucks, where the guy hire him at full time pay, in spite of being 17 years old, AND says he can bring the baby to work with him? Uh huh.

He then meets Michael, who invites him to move in with him. They are found out, and go on the run together, and they go...two towns over. Seriously? They get caught by the police, his mom doesn't press charges against him for kidnapping, which I don't think is even possible, I think the state does that. Michael gets out of it by saying James kidnapped him too. Mother takes James and the baby, who James has named Alice (oh yeah, the parents never bothered to name her!) home, and the abuse starts up again. These parents make comic book villains look realistic. His mom beats him and calls him fag, and imprisoned with the baby. His dad remarks that taking care of babies is woman's work, but since James is such a fag, he can take care of her. Until they find someone to buy her, that is. Then he beats the shit out of James some more, and rapes him for good measure.

Michael finds them and busts them out, and they go back to Michael's apartment. You know, where they were living before? NOT to a new, unknown place. After a few days/weeks, the parents find and take the baby, Alice. They go after her, James kills his father in self defense, he wake up in the hospital, they give Alice back to him and Michael, and they go home. WTF? After a year, James finally decides to go to the police with everything that happens, and just on James' word, his mom goes to prison for life, and nothing is ever said about his father's death? And they all live happily after, the utterly ridonkulous, unbelievable, end!